"Just for the heck of it"
I used to be a 'classic introvert'. I could happily spend weeks - months even - by myself at home actualizing my many ideas. I did enjoy spending time with friends, but my 'inner world' as they call it, was a deep ocean and I was happy to swim in solitude.
As I got a little older, I became what some call a 'social' introvert. I enjoyed being more social, but I still needed lots of me time.
I really loved deep, authentic connections, but they seemed to happen more rarely for me.
Of course, socially awkward introverts tend to be like that. We need someone to look past our awkward, to sense our 'potential'. To welcome that potential to come out like a newly adopted cat that hides in your basement until it decides it's ready to explore its new home.
Once I got into my late 20s, I started to notice a shift. I didn't really want to do things 'alone' as much. In fact, eventually I would decide not to do certain things, or not go to certain things if I couldn't find a friend to join me.
What I didn't yet understand - it's not that I was afraid to go alone - it's that deep down, I wanted to share the experience. I wanted someone to relate with and talk to about it. I wanted to feel connected. It's a lot harder to have a more deeply connected experience with a complete stranger, even if they're very friendly.
I must have intuited this desire to a degree, as the projects and activities I pursued began to take on a more collaborative bent. I tried to immerse myself more in community, but with mixed results.
I knew what I was striving for, just not how to reliably get it. So I still ended up working on a lot of projects that ended up being solo. I would try to find collaborators but my friends were not creative entrepreneurs like me.
These days, people know me as one of the hardest hustlers out there. I dream big and hustle hard. No one is just going to hand you your dream life.
I was having a chat recently with a friend, and we were talking about hustle and fatigue and burnout. She acknowledged that she could tell that I care a lot and am putting in the work, and gave me kudos for that. Who doesn't like to see someone 'really doing the thing'?
She noted though that it seemed like I didn't know how to do anything other than hustle. She didn't have a sense of how I 'unwind'.
She said some people go sit by the lake and listen to the water and think, some people dance around in their kitchen to cheesy pop tunes, everyone needs to have something they do 'just for the heck of it' to unwind and destress.
The she asked me.
"What's YOUR just for the heck of it?"
I paused and thought for a moment.
Do I have 'just for the heck of it' things? Of course I do.
But as I did my best to explain to my friend - I think the prevailing theme of my adult life has been wanting to share and connect. I used to really struggle to accomplish that the way I wanted to, but that's not the case anymore.
I'm a big fan of timely and relevant quotes, this one is timeless:
"Sorrow shared is cut in half. Joy shared is doubled"
I currently live alone, and don't have a business partner or a life partner.
I'm driven and proud of the work I'm doing, but being an entrepreneur can definitely be lonely. So it doesn't appeal to me as much to go for walks alone or dance around alone, and there isn't a good communal space nearby in my area. I end up spending a lot more time by myself than I would choose to if it was easier not to.
I know it's a short term sacrifice.
Part of the reason I started my first podcast back in 2013 was because I kept having these really incredible conversations with friends and I would think to myself 'damn! I really wish that conversation had been recorded so others could hear it too!'
Because it left us both really happy and fulfilled, lit up, expanded... why wouldn't I want to share that?
The below is not from my first podcast, but it demonstrates the same thing.
In 2019, I had been thinking I wanted to write a book. I'd never written one before, but so what? So, 'just for the heck of it', I started writing.
Then the pandemic hit, and many 'pandemic projects' were born. And on Dec 30th, 2020 - I hit save on the final edit, and published my book to Amazon.
Here's me holding a copy of my book with my friend Vivian, who is holding her book:
In mid 2023, I had a sense that 2024 was going to be a very busy year.
I was right, just not in the way I thought. But I decided I wanted to 'end the year on a high note'. I looked at my bucket list and decided, why not finally try standup comedy...
Just for the heck of it.
While technically standup comedy is a 'solo' activity, the point is to connect with the crowd, and get them to laugh. It's a very vulnerable and intimate experience. I love the joy on my face here:
Last year I started organizing and hosting in-person events, because I wanted to create and hold space for people to come together to connect, share, relate, and grow. It lights me up and brings me great joy. And i'm not the only one!
At first I had reached out to some people who were already organizing events, and asked if they would be interested in collaborating. The response was often 'we don't really need help with our existing event and we're not looking to start something new'.
So I eventually just said 'to heck with it, I'm just going to do it myself'
And thus PLAYSPACE: A playful and creative workshop for grown ups was born.
Back in December the opportunity popped on my radar to make a short film for Canadian Film Fest (CFF). I had always wanted to make a short film.
So I signed up for CFF without any plan or team in place (pretty much 'just for the heck of it'!)
I just knew it was a thing I wanted to do, and I would find a way to bring a few people together to make some magic happen - and we did! Here is the cast and crew wrap photo from the end of the (one day) shoot:
And this is what it comes down to for me now. "Just for the heck of it" is more about making magic happen - with people. I am happiest in these moments. I've been told I have 'golden retriever energy' in those moments.
All the 'solo' time is basically spent doing prep to make these moments possible. And that's part of why I am building my own thing, because I want these moments to be every day, not just some evenings and weekends around a 9-5.
When I was younger and more introverted - the magic happened mostly inside me, and other people would get to see it periodically. Now I want to help make as much magic outside of me as I can. This includes by bringing people together, and helping bring the best out of them.
Sometimes you just have to say 'to heck with it, let's try it and see what happens!'
Shine Language is about joy, among other things. It's about my joy, your joy, collective joy.
So if I can get some people together, 'just for the heck of it' or otherwise and make some magic happen - I'm going to do it. Because I will never regret it. And that's how you know what you'll get with me.
If you want to work with me to amplify your joy and find your Shine Language - drop me a line. Lacey@laceyartemis.com.
Let's get you shining. Or put me on your stage and have me get your audience shining.
Lacey Artemis (she/they) is a neurodivergent speaker, consultant, and media producer. She is the founder of Neuromix Consulting which provides sensory accessibility and neuro-inclusion consulting, as well as anti-burnout play workshops. You can find out more at www.neuromixconstulting.com.
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